My time

I took a test at the end of my shift at work with a friend, she was convinced I was pregnant. Tasha was such a good friend, we had weekly dinner dates. She bought two tests, I couldn’t buy them cause Cindy might find out. I took the first one and it immediately showed up as pregnant. I was convinced it was a false positive. The second one I took and said the same, no waiting the two minutes, it was positive. 

I’m not sure if it was the shock of it, but don’t recall telling Tyler. I know I did I just can’t remember how it happened. I remember Tyler being excited and thought it was the best news he ever heard. While Tyler jumped for joy, I sat calmly while my mind raced. I had convinced myself that I didn’t need kids, that if I couldn’t get pregnant I would adopt. 

I wasn’t letting anyone stop me from becoming a mother, I just didn’t expect it at twenty two years old. When I told my parents, Tyler wasn’t there with me to tell them. That was my decision, especially since my parents were aware of his drug addiction and temperament while on drugs. I thought it was best to tell my parents alone to get a real response. Be careful what you ask for, I told my parents and got the worst look from my mother. 

This wasn’t a sincere, sympathetic, or even emotional look she gave me. If I had to describe it, it would almost be a look of desperation and jealousy. My mother and I weren’t on good terms and for her not to support me was devastating. Everything I was mad at my mom for was gone and I just wanted her to comfort me. She didn’t, she wasn’t happy and told me “this isn’t good news, what were you thinking”. 

I wasn’t thinking anything except that I was going to have this baby and no one was stopping me. When Tyler told his parents, without me there, I guess he got he same reaction.