My time

While working at the hospital I was helping a patience back into bed when he said “oh my, I hope your pregnant cause something kicked me”. I had leaned over him to fix his oxygen and my belly mashed his arm into the bed. I laughed and said “yes, I‘m having a boy, he’s very active”. He said, “you must be eating spicy foods”. I definitely was every day, some times three times a day, also carried a bottle of hot sauce with me. He told me then that his wife always wanted spicy food and their daughter was very active as well.

I always enjoyed the stories people had with their experiences, the good ones at least. There are some women that have those extreme labor stories that make you cringe. I had a friend tell me how she ate spicy Indian food the night before she went into labor. When she was told to push, she would see the doctor use his arm to sweep something off the table, it was diarrhea. I admittedly went to my doctor and asked for the real deal on labor. She told me if I rocked back and forth on a yoga ball that I would have an easy labor and delivery. That became my religion, all day every day since I was on bedrest and she said that was the only thing I could do out of bed. 

I couldn’t sit still, no way lay in bed all day, especially dealing with Tyler going missing whenever it happened. I wasn’t working and by the time I would go into labor, I would be out of paid time off at the hospital. We had nothing in savings, he spent everything on drugs. As soon as he got paid, he spent it. I had no control over anything and it was waring on me bad. My due date, they said, was August 15th, my dads birthday. I was so excited he would share a birthday with my dad. That was until the end of July, he had enough. 

Before the Epidural