My time

 I finished a book that, again, resonates with me on a different level. “Listen for the Lie” by Amy Tintera, a murder mystery thriller. No, I haven’t killed anyone, no one has died, Yet. At the end of the book, if you haven’t read it stop reading, she points out many big facts that resonates with my current life style, if you will. 

A woman is accused, never convicted, of murdering her best friend. She has no alibi and suffered from a concussion that took her memory. Any ways, not to give too much away, She points out that people will judge you on what they WANT to believe, not facts provided. She also points out that even the ones you love most aren’t always on your side. It’s a hard lesson to learn, but there are the smallest reasons to hold grudges, especially with blood.

Coincidentally, she had a “Matt”, her husband until the murder. She was faced with a traumatic experience, lost her best friend, and can’t help to solve the murder. Her husband, Matt, kicked her out of the house believing she was capable of murder. Her parents, they didnt turn their backs, but they didn’t help or support her when she needed them most. 

Doesn’t that sound familiar? I was left with an empty house with no job and no help from either Matt or his family. That was on me, allowing a man to come into my life at his lowest and expect the same respect when roles are reversed.

Lucy, back to the book, had no one in her corner, not until she met a stranger that fully trusted her, even when she couldn’t trust herself. 

I guess I can’t reflect on that part, after getting a message from Matt today. I sent a song to Matt by Adele, Love in the dark”. First lyrics are “Take your eyes off of me so I can leave”, “I can’t stay this time, ‘cause I don’t love you anymore”, “It feels like we are oceans apart”. Any ideas what this mother fucker sends me? The only part that truly matters is “but I don’t miss having to prove that you’re important or that my love was real. If you ever figure out if you want me, you know there’s ways left open to reach out.” Instead of him owning up to his part in all this, instead its on me to “figure out”.