My time

Today, a week after they wanted me to originally start, I received the background and drug screen result email. The letter states “there is information in the report which, if accurate, may prevent us from offering you employment, promotion, or retention at this time”. I had previously discussed my drug screen coming back positive of marijuana and the hiring manager still wanting to proceed. 

I sent her an email to reaffirm my interest in the Paycom Specialist position that was offered. Part of me is worried, but at the same time, why continue the hiring process knowing the drug screen would come out as I had told her? If she assumed I would “clean my system” to get a negative result, that was not my assumption. 

I have “quit” smoking since we had discussed the drug screen but have hated every minute of it. Every night I lay in bed in pain and my mind stressing to the dark side without it. Should I depend on that, probably not, but does it help me tremendously with my physical and mentally wellbeing, absolutely! Texas is not completely against it and after some research, Leafwell could possibly help me get what I need to move forward on this job while I wait to hear back from the hiring manager. 

When I feel like I do as much as I can to do everything “right” theres always something to stop me. I can’t physically get better until I have money and health insurance, I can’t mentally get the help I need without money and health insurance. And just like that I was approved for medical cannabis….not sure if this helps with the job but sure will help me physically and mentally moving forward. 

Well, they retracted the offer and I’m back to square one again. I’m overwhelmed with anger. I had so much hope, I was honest and they didn’t care. Why would they have me go through all this KNOWING the outcome we already discussed? Once I calmed down, I realized that job wasn’t the right one. They sent me an expired I9 form, communication was awful, and I would have been in the same down position I’ve been in with my previous companies.  (That’s what I will keep telling myself)